I had been doing really well with keeping the house tidy. Having the cleaning couple come every two weeks has been a big part of that. It requires me to keep the surfaces mostly clear so they can do their job. One month between cleanings is too long. Two weeks is almost too long, the clutter starts to creep back in by the end of two weeks and I have to run around clearing surfaces on day 13 to get ready for them (I’m sorry Rachel...).
The last few weeks though, I’m generally a mess. I have work projects everywhere. That one corner of the kitchen counter is starting to pile up again. Laundry is taking over the bedroom floor because the hampers are full. Toys scattered. Last time the cleaning couple came, I just piled the piles a little nicer so they could get around them and clean most of the counter.
As a result of this I feel internally cluttered. If your external environment is chaotic, your internal environment has no choice but to follow suit.
I’m emotional. I’m irrational. I’m scattered. I feel uneasy.
There’s tons of reasons why I got to this place of disorder again. Chris’s schedule is way out of whack. He’s closing a ton of nights he normally doesn’t so I’m parenting alone. We have Cash home for 10 days straight which means 4 hours in the car a day taking him to and from school during rush hour traffic. I’m trying to work in between because I have a show next weekend.
Why is it, if I know that external clutter causes internal chaos, that I don’t fall back harder into the systems that would keep my environment calm? My go to is to let the chaos build and let my home reflect my internal state and vice versa.
As moms, our plates get overflowed with everyone else’s stuff. Chris’s scheduling, ex-husband’s honeymoon, Cash’s lengthy commute to school. We tend to carry everyone else’s burdens on top of our own. I let that internal load manifest itself externally, which then creates more chaos internally.
When your home is cluttered, your heart is cluttered.
It’s time to roll up my sleeves and restore order, so my heart can rest.